clinicals

all of a sudden youre just there. youre thrown into a world out of your comfort zone and put entirely in a position in where someone else puts their life in your hands.

just my second week of clinicals and i although its still torture to wake up at 530am, i think my body is starting to adjust. its the full 6 hour shift with no break that kills me more i think. we come out of clinicals earlier without taking a lunch, but the tradeoff is that we're almost about to collasp from hunger.

but looking at all of that and actually experiencing all of this is unexplainable. it was my first day taking care of my patient by myself. i watched the CNA as she changed my patient so roughly that inside i wanted to pull her hair, but i knew i didnt have a right as just a student there. it bothered me so much so see people in the healthcare system that turned nursing into a complete "job," forgetting completely what the definition of nursing is. it only reminded me that this is what i really want to do with my life, and take nursing as a profession that i will never turn into just a job.

and in the end of it...that feeling of seeing your resident smile at you and tell you thank you is a feeling i cant compare to anything else.